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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Tranquility
- It's all in the mind- your mind.It's not brought about in an instant by serene surroundings,nor by the sound of soulful music, nor the beauty of summer blooms.The most luxurious surrounding can not fill an empty soul. It's like a vessel, the slightest crack will cause leaks, it can never be filled. It is not whole.You are a precious vessel. Be the first to acknowledge this,and treasu...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Problems arent bad after all!
- At first glance, when tough times hit, it seems the world around you is crashing down. You're surrounded by a sea of problems, threatening to engulf you any minute from now. A second, more discerning glance however, could reveal a totally different, even exciting perspective! Could God be the author of your "problems?"A problem is a sign that things are not working. If they do not...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Life is a mystery...or is it?
- Being the last of three daughters, I was a suprise to my parents who were being very cautious about not having any more children. At the age of 30 my mother found out she was expecting her third child, and not very happy about it at that. All my life growing up I was constantly reminded how I was not planned for and consequently not really wanted. But thank goodness I was a good baby and actually ...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Finding inspiration to realise your dreams and ambitions
- "Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great." Mark TwainAnyone learning to do business online (it is a constant learning curve), will, I hope, find something of benefit here. At my business site, www.tucats-design.com, you'll find all the typical resources, but what of the more imp...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Need a boost? take a look at how far youve come
- Too many of us are too hard on ourselves, always alert to that devilish voice whispering "you should be farther along in life". Smother that voice right now by reading this quote by Booker T. Washington:"I have learned that success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome while trying to succeed."What enviabl...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - The pursuit of greatness
- On June 3rd, 1948, a blast rocked the Black Hills of South Dakota. Ten tons of stone were dislodged from the mountainside and tumbled to the earth below. Earlier that day, a man named Korczak had ascended the mountain and single-jacked four holes at 6,740 feet above sea level.Single-jacking is the practice of placing a drill-bit against hard rock, slamming it with a four-pound sledge hammer...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Nothing to celebrate
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 12, 2002I came across your column by accident. Boy, was it impeccable timing. I am sitting here writing you on my anniversary weekend. Home alone, while my husband is on a three day golf fling with his buddies. I have cried for two days.This is a reality check for me, knowing our problems through 23 years are still there even after couns...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - For old times sake
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 19, 2002I am currently going through a divorce, and we've been negotiating the terms of the settlement for a year and a half without agreement. I have started a relationship with another woman, but I'm in a saddening, irresponsible situation that was mischievously planned by the ex.About four months ago I went to the ex's to pick up our ...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - A plausible defense
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 5, 2002I just looked at your website and read "Wanting To Be Caught," and I truly think that is awful advice! You said and I quote, "You can't act as if you had no wish to end the marriage when you undertook marriage ending actions."I have just been caught cheating on my husband of 16 years, and at no point was I wanting to end my marria...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - A bit of turbulence
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 1, 2002I'm a 26-year-old flight attendant engaged to be married in 10 weeks. Our wedding reception was to be held in a marquee in my in-laws' garden. On Saturday night my future mother-in-law flipped out at my fiancé for wanting to marry me.On Sunday she verbally attacked me at their house. This woman, who is very unhappy ...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Repeat offender
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 8, 2002I am a 26-year-old escort, in the business on and off since I was 14. I have a tendency to get involved in very bad relationships.The men I go out with are usually abusive with substance abuse problems, and generally I end up supporting them. I don't have many friends because it seems people only deal with me because they are trying...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - A teller of tales
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 10, 2002I told my daughter I didn't think my daughter-in-law paid enough attention to her oldest son, 8. He has attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, is on Ritalin, and lately has been kicking and hitting little kids.My daughter and I had a falling out, and she told my daughter-in-law what I said. My daughter-in-law was furious. I trie...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Two drops of water
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 17, 2002My problem is that I am falling in love. My friend and I are both 23. He lives in the United States, seven hours away from where I live in Canada. Just yesterday I came back from seeing him again.I always have such a wonderful time, but this time on the trip home I started missing him as if a part of myself was also missing. It was...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Product testing
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 24, 2002I suppose there are worse problems than having two men who want to share their life with me. However, it is a genuine problem. I do need advice on sorting this all out.My former husband and I wanted a baby and soon had one. The problems in our marriage stemmed from two teenage daughters from his first marriage. Their mom jumped shi...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Nine lives
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of September 2, 2002My husband of four years has been arrested for the fourth time for hurting me. This time he strangled me. I always go back with him. He is in jail now with no money to post for his own bail.I thought I loved him, but lately I can't stand his behind. He is unemployed and so possessive it's hard for me to breathe sometimes. He fo...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - An unquenched thirst
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of September 9, 2002I'm engaged to a wonderful, warm and loving man whom I've been with for four years. We have always had mismatched libido. I would prefer to have sex nearly every day, but he would choose once a week or less.Early in our relationship we fought about this issue. He let me see that if I asked for sex much more than he wanted, he f...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Bad blood
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 26, 2002Recently my father passed away. My problem is he never filed a will through the court, but he did have a holographic will, which is an unwitnessed, handwritten will. That will popped out of nowhere.My father owned a nice middle-class home. My younger sister wanted his home because it is a lot more spacious than her own. I persona...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Care and maintenance of the human hard drive
- The human brain is very much like a hard drive. If you stop to think of it, they are both filled with billions of tiny bits of information, stored in the memory cells just waiting to be accessed. They both use electrical energy to find those bits and put them together to recreate something that we have placed there. They work on demand, and we expect them to instantly give us what we want.A...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Embracing your wildness
- As small children, we were all wild. Not unlike the wolf pup in the den, we ran when we felt like it, sniffed or tasted things to see what they were, yelled when the mood struck us and danced at the drop of a hat. We loved to dig in the earth, heave a rock into a pool, roll and tumble on the ground and run naked whenever we could. We loved ourselves and we loved our bodies. We knew no fear....
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Reality check
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of September 16, 2002Two years ago I made the greatest mistake of my life. I started dating a coworker. She is this beautiful young girl that totally captivated my world when I met her.As time went by I realized we have almost nothing in common, including music, food, sports, movies, and outdoor activities, to name just a few. Worst of all, there ...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Impaired judgment
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of September 23, 2002My husband has a twofold addiction problem, drinking and drugs. In the six years we have been married, he has had periods of sobriety, but they don't ever last. I feel he has not confronted the underlying problem: he was molested as a child by a family member.He is currently in jail due to getting drunk and hitting a police ca...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Mitigating factors
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of September 30, 2002I am writing for advice on a personal dilemma of the most personal nature. I am male, mid-40s, married 20 years.After all these years, I still long to make love to my wife two or three times per week, while she seems to prefer two or three times per year, if ever. Best I can tell, she no longer enjoys making love whatsoever an...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - It only takes a spark - pass it on
- Great inspiring people have influenced people in every area of life throughout centuries. Henry David Thoreau, the great 19th century transcendentalist writer, was influenced by the great Ralph Waldo Emerson. Thoreau was the impetus for Ghandi's and Martin Luther King Jr's civil disobedience, which ultimately changed the shape of the world for a better humanity. Socrates taught Plato who taught Ar...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Need for a belief system: a system of organization for your experiences!
- I've spoken with many people who, over time, have felt inundated by their lives. It seems as though they've accumulated all of these memories and experiences, but the information seems jumbled and overwhelming. This pile of 'mind junk' keeps getting in their way whenever they attempt to move forward in life. It's as if they feel that they have to deal with each and every disassociated memory lying...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Reclaiming our resilient spirit
- Our spirits are taking a beating. The daily barrage of bad news, violence, shrinking resources, global warming, and economic slowdown can put us in a state of frustration and paralysis. Some days, getting out of bed can be a challenge.Within the word "resilience" are actions we can take to reclaim our bounce-back ability.R: Remember to breathe. The ability to calm down is critical in...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Wake-up call
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of October 7, 2002In the first half of May, I went through two remarkable changes. One was physical and the other involved emotional recall.The physical one was what I thought was flu and a heavy dose of it. It was accompanied by a surreal shivering never experienced before or since. The recall was of a family I knew in my school days more than 20...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Maternal instincts
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of October 14, 2002I am a woman in her mid-60s whose husband passed away, and I do not want to enter into a relationship with another man. I have no family in town other than my daughter.I always counted on the fact she would be around for me in my older years. However, I recently discovered she may be moving eight hours away to live with her boyf...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Playing with fire
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of October 21, 2002I am a stay-at-home mom, 24, married to my husband, 26, for six years. He has a problem chatting with young girls online.I have "caught" him numerous times, and it's always the same thing. He's sorry and says it's only a game to him, but he continues to do it. He works with a high school program and knows these girls in real lif...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - A plan of attack
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of October 28, 2002I feel I am at the breaking point. I work at a small school and run the office. I do all the financials, secretarial work, and reception duties. While staffing has increased in the classroom, it has not in administration.I shared my feeling with the principal on Monday and clearly stated things must change. Teachers need to take...
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- 2007-11-13 22:16:19 - Neither a borrower
- Direct Answers - Column for the week of November 4, 2002I moved from Los Angeles to Europe with my husband and children. My sister's husband left her with three children. She sent an e-mail today asking me to "give" her $1000 so her lawyer will continue representing her.My sister already owes her lawyer $9000. She owes my other sister $5000, and she never talks about paying it back. ...
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